天津条约内容及影响:讲个最短的英语笑话

---Date?
___Engaged.

______________________
这是一个身受重伤昏迷多日后醒过来的士兵问护士：几号了？
护士：订婚了。
护士把date理解成了“约会”。

农夫和蛇Farmer & Snake

It was a cold winter evening, an old man had don his work and was going home from the fields.

On his way he saw some thing on the ground. He looked at it and found it was a snake.

It was not dead,but it couldn\'t move because it was so cold.

\"Poor thing,\" the man said, \"I must try to save your life.\"

\"He picked it up and looked for a warm place to put it in.

But how could he find one in such cold weather? So he decided to put the snake inside his clothes,right nest to his heart.

A few minutes later,the snake came back to life and began to move.

When it had become strong enough.it gave the man a deadly bite.

He killed it and went on.When he got back,he was very ill and had to lie down.
农夫和蛇Farmer & Snake

It was a cold winter evening, an old man had don his work and was going home from the fields.

On his way he saw some thing on the ground. He looked at it and found it was a snake.

It was not dead,but it couldn't move because it was so cold.

"Poor thing," the man said, "I must try to save your life."

"He picked it up and looked for a warm place to put it in.

But how could he find one in such cold weather? So he decided to put the snake inside his clothes,right nest to his heart.

A few minutes later,the snake came back to life and began to move.

When it had become strong enough.it gave the man a deadly bite.

He killed it and went on.When he got back,he was very ill and had to lie down.

He knew he was dying.
农夫和蛇Farmer & Snake

It was a cold winter evening, an old man had don his work and was going home from the fields.

On his way he saw some thing on the ground. He looked at it and found it was a snake.

It was not dead,but it couldn't move because it was so cold.

"Poor thing," the man said, "I must try to save your life."

"He picked it up and looked for a warm place to put it in.

But how could he find one in such cold weather? So he decided to put the snake inside his clothes,right nest to his heart.

A few minutes later,the snake came back to life and began to move.

When it had become strong enough.it gave the man a deadly bite.

He killed it and went on.When he got back,he was very ill and had to lie down.

He knew he was dying.

农夫和蛇Farmer & Snake

It was a cold winter evening, an old man had don his work and was going home from the fields.

On his way he saw some thing on the ground. He looked at it and found it was a snake.

It was not dead,but it couldn't move because it was so cold.

"Poor thing," the man said, "I must try to save your life."

"He picked it up and looked for a warm place to put it in.

But how could he find one in such cold weather? So he decided to put the snake inside his clothes,right nest to his heart.

A few minutes later,the snake came back to life and began to move.

When it had become strong enough.it gave the man a deadly bite.

He killed it and went on.When he got back,he was very ill and had to lie down.

He knew he was dying.

农夫和蛇Farmer & Snake

It was a cold winter evening, an old man had don his work and was going home from the fields.

On his way he saw some thing on the ground. He looked at it and found it was a snake.

It was not dead,but it couldn't move because it was so cold.

"Poor thing," the man said, "I must try to save your life."

"He picked it up and looked for a warm place to put it in.

But how could he find one in such cold weather? So he decided to put the snake inside his clothes,right nest to his heart.

A few minutes later,the snake came back to life and began to move.

When it had become strong enough.it gave the man a deadly bite.

He killed it and went on.When he got back,he was very ill and had to lie down.

He knew he was dying.

He knew he was dying.

农夫和蛇Farmer & Snake

It was a cold winter evening, an old man had don his work and was going home from the fields.

On his way he saw some thing on the ground. He looked at it and found it was a snake.

It was not dead,but it couldn't move because it was so cold.

"Poor thing," the man said, "I must try to save your life."

"He picked it up and looked for a warm place to put it in.

But how could he find one in such cold weather? So he decided to put the snake inside his clothes,right nest to his heart.

A few minutes later,the snake came back to life and began to move.

When it had become strong enough.it gave the man a deadly bite.

He killed it and went on.When he got back,he was very ill and had to lie down.

He knew he was dying.

I:"Im sorry"
my foreigner teacher:"Im sorry too"
I:"Im sorry three"
my foreigner teacher:"what are you sorry for?"
I:"Im sorry five"

看明白了吗？是不是和很短小精悍？哈哈

guest:What is the fly doing in my soup?
waiter: He is swimming, sir.
客人：这只苍蝇在我汤里干嘛？
招待：他在游泳，先生。

i saw a saw saw a saw .我看见一个锯子在锯一个锯子,